My wife was diagnosed with Breast Cancer in March 2009. Back then we didn't know that I was going to receive my own cancer diagnosis only seven months later. But in this mini series of six parts called "Our Breast Cancer", I intend to talk about how our lives have changed when we learned about my wife's cancer. It's important that you understand, that the following text is from my point of view only, not my wife's .
I was travelling for business from Jersey to North Carolina. I believe it was the afternoon of March 3rd (2009), when my wife Ann called me up in my hotel room. I knew that she just went for her annual mammogram. They had her coming back in because they saw something on the slides and wanted a biopsy done. But we weren't concerned at all because that happened to us before and also to Ann's sisters. I think they call it having lumpy breasts, if a woman has little masses in her breast tissue. Anyway, there was absolutely not even the remotest thought of Breast Cancer.
So I was completely in shock when she told me, that her doctor had just called her to tell her, that she had Breast Cancer. It was brutal. I cannot even describe what and how I felt. I felt empty and overwhelmed at the same time. This couldn't be true. Not my wife. I started crying and maybe that's what made me feel so guilty. Because I knew I had to be strong now for Ann, yet, there I was, crying my heart out.
The most devastating part in that moment was the fact, that I couldn't be with my wife to comfort her. I got angry because I was so far away with no chance to get back home. If I was lucky, maybe I could get on a flight the next day.
When we hung up the phone, I completely fell apart. I pray for you that you will never have to go through anything like that.
And something else happened. All the things in life I had worried about, e. g. our mortgage, the bills, the future, everything became instantaneously unimportant. There was only one thing that really mattered, and that was Ann's health. The rest was irrelevant. Period. I prayed my heart out and begged the Lord for help. He was probably surprised to hear from me after such a long time - but I felt that he heard me and that gave me some comfort.
There was nothing more on earth I wanted to do but get back to Ann as soon as possible. I had nothing to lose, so I went on the internet and checked my airline's flight schedule for the night. I was happy when I realized that there were a few available empty seats, so I immediately changed my original booking. But only five minutes later I received a call from the airline. That flight was getting cancelled, because of the bad weather that was expected later that night. But they offered me to get me on the 7:30pm flight instead. That was very nice of them, however, that meant that I had only 40 minutes to pack my luggage, check out at the hotel and get a cab over to the Raleigh airport.
My hotel was very kind and offered me a lift to the airport. But I was unlucky with the driver. He meant well but coming from the Kentucky area and since he just started his new job, he missed the one and only highway exit off to the airport. And the next chance to turn around was about 15 miles away. I didn't show it, but inside of me I was falling apart.
But sometimes in my life and especially when everything seems to break down, something strange happens. Even though we were way late when I arrived at the airport, the plane was still waiting. It was actually waiting for me and three other passengers who were desperately trying to make it on time. And miraculously, just a few hours later I was back at my house in Jersey and holding my wife Ann in my arms. - 31372
I was travelling for business from Jersey to North Carolina. I believe it was the afternoon of March 3rd (2009), when my wife Ann called me up in my hotel room. I knew that she just went for her annual mammogram. They had her coming back in because they saw something on the slides and wanted a biopsy done. But we weren't concerned at all because that happened to us before and also to Ann's sisters. I think they call it having lumpy breasts, if a woman has little masses in her breast tissue. Anyway, there was absolutely not even the remotest thought of Breast Cancer.
So I was completely in shock when she told me, that her doctor had just called her to tell her, that she had Breast Cancer. It was brutal. I cannot even describe what and how I felt. I felt empty and overwhelmed at the same time. This couldn't be true. Not my wife. I started crying and maybe that's what made me feel so guilty. Because I knew I had to be strong now for Ann, yet, there I was, crying my heart out.
The most devastating part in that moment was the fact, that I couldn't be with my wife to comfort her. I got angry because I was so far away with no chance to get back home. If I was lucky, maybe I could get on a flight the next day.
When we hung up the phone, I completely fell apart. I pray for you that you will never have to go through anything like that.
And something else happened. All the things in life I had worried about, e. g. our mortgage, the bills, the future, everything became instantaneously unimportant. There was only one thing that really mattered, and that was Ann's health. The rest was irrelevant. Period. I prayed my heart out and begged the Lord for help. He was probably surprised to hear from me after such a long time - but I felt that he heard me and that gave me some comfort.
There was nothing more on earth I wanted to do but get back to Ann as soon as possible. I had nothing to lose, so I went on the internet and checked my airline's flight schedule for the night. I was happy when I realized that there were a few available empty seats, so I immediately changed my original booking. But only five minutes later I received a call from the airline. That flight was getting cancelled, because of the bad weather that was expected later that night. But they offered me to get me on the 7:30pm flight instead. That was very nice of them, however, that meant that I had only 40 minutes to pack my luggage, check out at the hotel and get a cab over to the Raleigh airport.
My hotel was very kind and offered me a lift to the airport. But I was unlucky with the driver. He meant well but coming from the Kentucky area and since he just started his new job, he missed the one and only highway exit off to the airport. And the next chance to turn around was about 15 miles away. I didn't show it, but inside of me I was falling apart.
But sometimes in my life and especially when everything seems to break down, something strange happens. Even though we were way late when I arrived at the airport, the plane was still waiting. It was actually waiting for me and three other passengers who were desperately trying to make it on time. And miraculously, just a few hours later I was back at my house in Jersey and holding my wife Ann in my arms. - 31372
About the Author:
A few months after his wife Ann got diagnosed with Breast Cancer, the author of this article Tony Ulrich started his website called Our Breast Cancer Info Webpage. You just read Our Breast Cancer Chapter One from his mini essay 'Ann's an Tony's Breast Cancer Story'.
